| Ask Mom: Lighting a Fire under a Dawdler | | Posted on Thursday, November 19, 2009 at 5:00am |  Remember, God is the source of all wisdom.
If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him, (James 1:5).
Dear Mom:
How do you make a slowpoke speed up? There always seems to be one child that wants to dawdle, especially when the family is in a hurry.
I’ve noticed that my grand kiddos are starting to dawdle when it’s time to pick up their toys to leave my house. Of course I would like to think they want to hang with Granny longer, but I know that dawdling comes naturally to little ones. Adults tend to focus on the future and what’s coming up next, while young children live in the moment and focus on what they’re doing in the present. Understanding this helps a frustrated mom not to nag a child to “hurry up” over and over.
Time is a tough concept for kids to grasp. Three-year-old Micah loves clocks, always has. Even though he repeatedly asks his mom, “What time is it?” he doesn’t have a real concept of minutes and hours yet. When Micah dawdles, he not deliberately trying to slow down our schedule, he’s simply moving through time in his childlike way.
Finding Balance
I’ve seen too many families rushing around trying to get their kids to activities like soccer practice, dance lessons, and church meetings. The last thing we want to do is to make our kids frazzled about accomplishing too many things in too little of a time. On the other hand, life is fast paced and kids need to learn to keep up. So what’s a mom to do? Start by compromising with your child. Here are some ways to light a fire under a dawdler:
- Give fair warning. No one likes having to stop in the middle of something important, especially a child. It’s tough to stop instantly and switch gears. Give your child warning that you plan to leave in five minutes. To teach the concept of time, set a timer for five or ten minutes while they pick up their toys. Make it a fun and challenging to beat the clock.
- Understand your child’s feelings. Tell him you know that he’s having fun at the park, but it’s time to go. Let him know what you’re doing next—starting dinner, going to the store—watch your child become more understanding of your wishes as well.
- Simplify your child’s life. If she has too many books and toys to choose from, maybe it’s time to clean some out or put some away for a time. Don’t offer too many choices to a small child. The more she has to decide about, the longer it will take.
- Play “Let’s see who is faster.” Race with your child to complete a task. A trick I learned from a teacher worked like a charm in our house. Give each child a math problem at their skill level. Have them solve the problem and race to pick up toys or trash based on the solution.
- Set consequences. There’s always one child still eating after the family has long cleaned their plates. Or the child who never seems to quite finish his chores and the family has to wait to proceed with the next activity. They’re usually the ones who like to feel in control. At our house, we had a rule to help the slowpoke eaters. I’m a terribly fast eater and have to make myself slow down. My husband eats at an even pace—not too fast or slow. So the rule was that everyone had to finish at or close to the same time he did—this helped us woofers slow down and the slowpokes to speed up.
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven, (Ecclesiastes 3:1).
A time to speed up and get things done. A time to slow down and pace ourselves. The secret is learning to be sensitive the Holy Spirit telling us just how fast or slow we need to go.
| | | | |
 All comments are moderated. There will be a delay before your comment appears below. |
|
 Links  Recent Posts  Categories |
Sign up for The Spiritual Mom eZine and receive a FREE mom-inspiring screensaver.
|
|
View Main Weblog
Authorized Log-In